String beans and race cars

Lately I have been having the sort of days that make me not want to leave the Delta. Granted, no day is flawless, but I have at least been feeling like there is progress. Wong was right when he said that you are the most important factor in your classroom. Oddly enough, the less I try, the better it works. The days that I take my job less seriously, that I scold less and smile more, the days that I relax and get into it and act crazy and don’t care- these are the days that are the smoothest. Administration’s rules and my own ideas about classroom management convinced me that I had to be hard with my kids. In practice, I have found that being human is more effective.

I think that part of the allure of this place, of this job, is that every little spark, every smile, every correct answer and sometimes the subsequent celebratory (spell check says it’s not a word, I say it lies) antics, shines as a victory in a constant, tiresome battle. When something good happens, it makes you think that you just might could win (yeah, I said it). When I see my kids genuinely happy, I want to stick it in a bottle and label it and put in on a shelf where it will be safe forever.

Today was the sort of day that makes you feel like you never belonged here in the first place. First I was angry at the kids. Then I was angry at myself for not fixing it. Whether you have a good day or a bad one, Wong is still right- you are the most important factor in your classroom.

Something else- while I am completely aware of how important sleep is, every now and then I convince myself that I really don’t need it and actually manage to follow through. Then, of course, I remember why that was a bad idea. You can stay up and prepare for hours, have the best planned lesson you’ve ever taught, but if you can’t be flexible and think on your feet, it’s all over.

I guess it just feels like such a waste when you loose time or attention with a poorly managed situation. Those things are scarce enough already, especially with our kids.

So at this point I’m embarrassed to admit it, but there are still a thousand details I haven’t worked out and a thousand questions that I have about the best way to handle situations. Here are a couple of examples (please....PLEASE, tell me what you think- even if its stuff I’m sure I can work out on my own, it might help to have another opinion)



So you’re supposed to enforce your consequences exactly the same for every student, and if you don’t students say you’re playing favorites, and administration could get on your case about it- which, if they hear it from a student, they will. But. With some kids, the most effective action to take would be....let it go. Yes, cursing is against school policy. Every student who curses is supposed to be written up. And with some students that works, sort of. With others (the ones who really don’t care about being written up, who are at highest risk for dropping out of school), you loose all respect and credibility, and they turn off to your lessons.

I give essay tests in biology, and most of my students answer with a sentence, at most. I don’t want to fail them all- instinctively that doesn’t seem quite right, and would definitely get my administration on my case, but I also don’t want to lower my expectations and give them other work to make up for low test scores, which is what I have been doing. I have tried summarize short passages about biology with them in class to work on their writing skills, and I have also
tried writing example essays with them in class. Some of them will work really hard on in-class essays, if I am able to spend time with them one-on-one, and help explain the question. Any suggestions?

I had a list of things that I wanted to post about, but, frustratingly, I don’t remember most of them right now. One final comment...we spend so much time dealing with the bad stuff, but the beuty (my spelling) is usually surprising and powerful.