Why do we have to know this stuff, anyway?

I am surprised by how infrequently this question is posed. The issue has on rare occasion been raised during a lesson by a student athlete who has a realistic shot at professional sports, or a teenage mother (enough said).

I, however, am constantly considering this issue- along with a thousand others (my peers would say "what, that's it?" right about now). Every time I plan a lesson I try to make it relevant, and each time I present one I try to make it simple, catch interest, explain why the lesson is worth caring about. I still struggle, however, with a very basic question. What information is most important, really? Do I really buy the stuff I'm trying to sell my students?

Of course we all come up with our own answers for this. The students need to learn thinking skills, they need to learn how to approach problems, they need to realize that they are capable of solving them and that their ideas are valid and original, they need to learn how to interpret language and get familiar with common concepts (inter vs. intra, accuracy vs. precision, mass vs. weight. ) I also have the more general answers: Students need to develop skills for college, to succeed in an environment rich (note sarcasm) in societal norms and expectations, to achieve to the best of their abilities.

I think part of the reason that this question of "what do they really need to know?" irks me so much is that I know better than to think I'm really giving them what they need. Everyday in the back of my mind while I'm teaching biology and chemistry, I'm aware that they really need someone to be there when they're going to make an awful decision, they need someone to help them want to strengthen character, to help them find what they love and realize that it's worth something and pursue it. What makes us what we are, anyway? What will make the difference for these kids, and what will they end up doing? I feel like filling out a hundred college applications for them (maybe college applications could be another after school activity/workshop), all for schools outside of their comfort zones so they realize there is more than what they see around them- there is always more-and that they have something to contribute. But then I sound like an outsider, and (I confess) feel like a failure. Every single day. I love what I do, I love teaching and communicating, I love it when it works. I feel like a failure. We were told we would feel this way, but I didn't really believe it, and it doesn't make me more effective if everyone feels the same way.

So I'm constantly wondering "What should I be teaching?". Responsibility, strength, character-?. Do I have enough of that stuff myself for anybody to learn it from me? My kids complain when they're hungry, when they're tired, when its cold, when it's hot. I tell them all the time- it won't always be comfortable- in fact it rarely will. You're going to be tired, you're going to get hungry. Circumstances are never perfect, but strength comes from getting through it anyway. That's how stuff gets done. I wonder if they hear me at all. I sound like I'm lecturing, even to myself.

Out of the billion things (or so it feels) that I'm worried about, I thought I'd update my blog a bit (not touched for over a month) and at talk a little about one of them. I have at least three really urgent things to be doing right now....I think average is about seven these days...thanks for reading. Hope your night's a good one.